Saturday, December 8, 2007

Deep Thoughts - On the Nature of Hell


This afternoon, the COG and I drove through Boston to the south shore. We spent a very long time in start-and-stop traffic in a tunnel that seemed to go on forever. I said to the COG, 'We're in Hell. This is what Hell is like: not a blade of grass anywhere, no birds, just polluted air and big cars whose drivers have road rage. Maybe we had an accident back there and we're really dead and in Hell'

He agreed that it was, indeed, his Hell.

Then we saw the light at the end of the tunnel and we rejoiced.

However, when we got to the end of the tunnel it was snowing hard. Visibility was bad, the road was slippery and all those angry, aggressive drivers were fighting to merge into 2 lanes from 3.

That was the perfect touch to complete the vision of Hell, making it even more hellacious. That little period of hope, of optimism when we saw the light, followed by the crushing of that faint hope under snow and road rage.

In the end, as it turned out, we weren't in Hell after all, but simply on the road to Ikea. We had a nice meal, bought some furniture and came home safe and sound.

I think that Hell, for me, would be a featureless filthy place created by human technology, with nothing of nature about it. Oh, and cold. It would be cold.

4 comments:

BabySis said...

So, I'm unclear...have we all Ikea ("a featureless filthy place created by human technology") to look forward to for our transgressions in life? Or do we spend eternity with marzipan and swedish meatballs, trying out sofas and admiring the creative new stuffed animals and kitchen systems, for all our good deeds in life? Or is that all the same thing?

peaceable_tate said...

Interesting! Me, I have thought of Hell as like the parking lot at the Mall of America on a busy Saturday before Christmas. So our hells have many of the same features. No hint of nature anywhere. Just traffic congestion, steel, concrete, gas fumes, wet, and frustrated strangers trying to maximize their gain at everyone else's expense. So it is very similar.

Though it sounds like people in your hell were still more or less following traffic rules and no one had weapons. You must not have quite reached the bottom circle of hell.

The Bride said...

Ikea was clean, quiet, well lighted, had pleasant people in it and lovely things, and lots of comfort. Though no birdsong. Not heaven, but better than hell.

We may not have reached the 9th circle of Hell, but there were a few moments when a weapon would have been useful, just after I began to hum Bach's 'Come Sweet Death'.

David Briggs said...

Babysis, LOL. Actually, I would think that an anti-Ikea would be closer to hell, because from what I have heard (never having been there myself, unfortunately) Ikea is a warm, clean, dry, and fairly quiet place. Whereas to me, hell would be a place which is none of those, or in other words, hell would be a cold, dirty, mouse, rat, and cockroach infested, wet, and noisy (in a bad way, if you know what I mean) place.