Monday, March 14, 2011

National Geographic Channel Shows: Deconstructed

I"ve been watching waaaay too many National Geographic Channel shows lately. I get sucked in by the promise of some kind of awesome new information because of new Chromo/thermo/DNA/
imaging/ satellite/new discoveries and then watch the whole show which turns out to be a waste of an hour.

So to save you the trouble, here are some quick synopses.

Finding Atlantis: It might be mythical, or maybe not. It might be on Crete, or in Greece or maybe even under a marsh in Southern Spain, or maybe not. More research may tell.

D.B.Cooper, Who Was He?: No one knows. He probably died the night he jumped from the plane with $200,000. But maybe not.

Amazing Sunken Treasures of the Nile: Over the past several millenia many broken stone things and some amphorae have ended up in the water of the Nile. More research may tell us what they mean. Oh, and it would have taken 200 men 10 days to chip out about 2 inches down along the side of an obelisk. That's about 1/4 inch per man per day.

Finding Jack the Ripper: Who was he? No one knows, but it's an exciting hobby for retired detectives, involving foreigh travel and making tv shows.

Countdown to Catastrophe, Mega Quake Seattle: It's only a matter of time before the area from Vancouver BC to Southern Oregon (including Seattle and Portland) and up to 50 miles inland has a mega earthquake like the one in Japan, or even larger, followed by a catastrophic Tsunami. No one knows when.

Egypt Unwrapped: The Mystery of the Screaming Man: conclusion: He wasn't really screaming, he just looks that way.

The Real Cleopatra: What a scheming bitch! She had her siblings killed or exiled and when she died there was no one to inherit, so Rome took over. Ha Ha serves you right, Cleopatra.

The Real George Washington: You thought the Father of Our Country was a secular saint who never told a lie? Guess again. He so lied to the British when he planted false information to deceive them during the war. And he had spies and he used secret codes and invisible ink to communicate with agents. Plus, he was a not-entirely-benevolent slave owner. So there, America.

One really interesting show didn't disappoint; however, I can still save you watching it.

Revealing Tutankhamen's Secrets: His two fetal daughters were buried with him and both had Marfan's Syndrome,so they died at 7 mo pregnancy and 5 mo pregnancy. He didn't have it, so his Sister, who was also his Wife must have had it. She was not one of the two unidentified royal female mummies from the same period, but not buried in his tomb. His father- Akenaten - had Marfan's, too, which is why he looks so weird in the pictures of him. When King Tut died he had the worst kind of Malaria, also a serious bone infection in his foot (which was painful and certainly necessitated use of a stick), and a compound fracture of his leg just above the knee - probably a chariot racing injury. One of the unidentified royal female mummies from the same period had a serious foot deformity and was probably a sister or cousin of his, but she didn't have Marfan's so she wasn't his wife. Conclusion: DNA is wonderful.

2 comments:

peaceable_tate said...

Thank you for your diligent research on National Geographic shows. I feel like I have gained hours of time and that twinge of regret that I missed the discovery of Atlantis/the real Cleopatra/The mystery of King Tut, that twinge is gone. or maybe not!

A great public service. Thank you.

Vivi said...

LOL